Mondays are rough. As a matter of fact, I spent most of my day sure it was a Monday, until I realized at 2:00 that I had been zombie-shuffling my way through a Tuesday. Not gonna lie, even knowing that it wasn’t Monday made my day at least a little better. If you’re struggling too, here are a few memes to help you toil your way through another Monday.
Aren’t we all dead inside right now? Isn’t that what our eyes are saying when we mutter “good morning” beside the coffee pot?
Ooph. So painful, so real. It’s like as soon as the weekend starts to sink in and we finally relax, Monday is kicked towards your hopeful, smiling face.
And it just gets worse when you punch in and realize that our Past Self dipped out early on Friday to leave all the work to our Future Self. Well, the future’s here, Past Self, and you’ve made it real hard for us both. Way to go, Past Self. Way to go.
100% me today. Even though it turned out to be Tuesday. Sometimes, you just gotta kick it and scroll through memes after a rigorous warmup on social media.
Okay, this one’s about school, but you can’t pretend it’s untrue now that you’re an adult. Just because we finished high school, college, trade school, or our GED program doesn’t mean we’re ~ready~ to get up on time. Jeez.
Unless, of course, you draw a coffee circle – then I’ll come running. Witches take note! Any weekend warrior will be at your beck and call with this simple summoning charm.
And you know I’ll run toward that coffee pentagram even faster if my Monday schedule looks even half as terrifying as this here dino.
Oh, the morning stages. Why is it that we only reach the fifth step of acceptance close to happy hour?
Every. Single. Morning. Even the lull of NPR was dulled today with their donation drive! I sometimes feel like as soon as I get the hang of the fact that it’s Monday, Tuesday has already come and gone.
Okay, you caught me. I’m a teacher. I’d be lying if I said some mornings didn’t feel like this as soon as the car creaks into the parking lot. Can’t I have another hour of sleep too?
…but once you get into the teacher’s lounge and set the pot to gurgling, all feels right in the world.
The Monday Morning Pessimist
Mr. Coffee, trust me – I know. It’s early. So early, in fact, I’m talking to my coffee.
When the first time the alarm goes off, I want to cry too. The buzzing really is the sound of nightmares beginning and dreams ending…
We all know we hit the snooze. No shame! Getting out of bed is rough. Especially when the snooze button only gives us ten more minutes? Ten hours is more like it.
But I guess we need all the time we can get – Mondays make it near impossible to get dressed. And there’s nothing worse than being at the front of a classroom or meeting and realizing your sweater is inside-out.
But does my sweater even matter when, the whole time, I’m making a face like Lucy’s? Is it Friday yet? Either way, I’ll pop some of that champagne.
And if I’m not magically crying like Lucy on a Sunday, then you know my stink face is on the same level as Betty White’s. At least there’s always that snooze button!
The only problem with the snooze button is that we could have spent that time washing our faces and running some dry shampoo through our bangs so we don’t look like we’ve just crawled out of a crypt.
Is it that we all look like crypt keepers who have seen better days because we spent all weekend eating our weight in French fries and downing champagne like it’s Monday’s coffee?
Okay, okay, last one of these, I promise. It’s just, after we put on our best eyeliner and lipstick Friday afternoon, don’t we all feel a little like Handsome Squidward? If only every Monday morning didn’t reveal yet another forehead wrinkle…
If we were as cute as these little babies, would Monday be a little less painful? I can’t imagine their warm cuddliness makes it any easier to get out of bed!
It’s even harder when we wake up already daydreaming about an afternoon nap.
But you know what? Screw it. He’s right. You can only be late to work once a morning. If you hit that snooze, just crank up the music on the way to work and enjoy the moment. Can’t be any later than late, can you?
Sometimes we wrangle ourselves through the front door at work only to realize that we’ve still got glitter under our nails and our shirt untucked on one side. But hey, at least we can pretend it’s glamorous?
Sometimes, no amount of running our fingers through our hair can undo the wreckage the weekend brought with it. Just gotta roll with it.
This. Every morning. What if I just stayed in bed with my dreams or a book? Fictional people are so much more fun than the real ones, and Mondays are so awful…
Without coffee, it feels like the cartilage has all oozed out of my joints and I can’t seem to get moving. Like poor old Jack, I’m frozen in place, nodding along to a colleague’s story without the faintest idea what they’re talking about.
Oh, Claire. Always so chipper. How could it be good on a Monday morning? Her joy leaves me feeling personally attacked.
Also, how could anything be good about Monday morning when the Alarm Demon is chewing at my ears and kicking me out of bed?
Sometimes, even knowing my coffee cup is across the room can feel like a hike.
Especially when I’m so tired it feels like every part of me aches at least a little bit. Even my hair.
When my head hits the pillow Monday night, I feel better about Tuesday. Maybe I’ll be rested. Maybe Tuesday will bring me a lot of happiness. But halfway through Tuesday…I realize it’s just the same.
Oh well, one day closer to Friday, right?
Happy Monday, friends! Go grab another coffee. You earned a break.